dwarf needs food

Baseballs

2008-06-21T11:57:00.004-06:00

Okkusenman!

2008-03-01T13:58:00.001-06:00

Hit me with your best shot!

2008-01-30T08:42:00.000-06:00

I saw this on With Leather but I had to re-post it here...

Fast forward to 1:25 to see the slow motion reaction shots. My favorite part comes a few seconds later at 1:43 when, despite the target falling to the ground in pain, the tennis ball machine continues to fire. Coming in a close second was the computer animation of the nut shot at 1:53.

Sunny D

2008-01-09T13:39:00.000-06:00

When did Sunny Delight become Sunny D? Probably around the same time that 'purple stuff' entered the lexicon...

I don't know about you, but I preferred California style to regular Sunny D. Tangy my ass, that stuff used to burn my throat.

My blog is a lot like this (like this)

2007-12-11T08:53:00.001-06:00

Douche

2007-09-17T16:05:00.000-06:00

If you perform a google image search for 'douche bag,' this is the guy that shows up first:

Now you know.

EDIT: Apparently douche baggery is a very dynamic field. The picture above is no longer on the first page of images returned when searching google for douche bag. Who knew?

I want to learn about the Tower of Babel next!

2007-09-05T07:36:00.000-06:00

Ha Ha! The French!

2007-08-31T09:58:00.000-06:00

Wink Wink Nudge Nudge

2007-08-26T08:31:00.001-06:00

I saw this the other day while I was in the cereal aisle.

You know they're friends with benefits...

NOT PENIS CREAM

2007-08-23T08:27:00.000-06:00

Actually, it is penis cream.

Say it ain't so, Woz...

2007-08-17T14:44:00.000-06:00

Ugghhh... I'm not an Apple fanboy (actually, I'm a lifelong PC user), but I really like Steve Wozniak. That's why I was saddened to hear from both Perez and wikipedia that Woz is dating Kathy Griffin.

C'mon! You can to better than the female Carrot Top!

This is for all my grad school friends...

2007-08-04T09:05:00.000-06:00

Stolen from marriedtothesea.com.

Simpsonized!

2007-07-30T07:07:00.000-06:00

This is what I would look like as a Simpsons character:

To find out what you would look like, head over to http://simpsonizeme.com/.

The Bat Boy sequence is my favorite.

2007-07-29T08:58:00.001-06:00

Weekly World News announced that it will suspend both the print and electronic version of the World's Most Reliable Newspaper on August 3, 2007.

(click the picture for a bigger version)

Bat Boy, you will be missed.

iHate iTunes

2007-07-27T07:32:00.001-06:00

I got an iPod shuffle for my birthday. My only complaint is iTunes. I understand why iTunes is useful for a regular iPod inasmuch as it's necessary to have some sort of organization when you're dealing with 40+GB of media files. With the limited size and capabilities of the shuffle, why can't Apple design software that allows me drag and drop songs into the shuffle without first importing them into iTunes? I'm not a computer programmer, but it doesn't seem like that would be an impossible task...

Boy/Girl Bicycles

2007-06-27T16:20:00.000-06:00

Do they still make what would be considered "boy" bikes? You know, the ones with the support bar that runs parallel to the ground and joins the seat support up high. Most of the bicycles I see are a sort of hybrid male-female, like this:

Something with computers?

2007-06-04T21:06:00.000-06:00

*stolen from collegehumor.com.
(takes a minute to load...)

Whenever I see $hit like this it makes me regret picking Chemical Engineering as my major. Sure, I find aspects of Chemical Engineering really fascinating, but compared to Photosynth most of the work that I do is drab. Maybe I'm short sighted, but if anything I work on is a success, about all I'll have to show for it is a nice Excel plot. These computer geeks create art. Just listen to the "oohs" and "aahs" from the audience... Can you imagine someone reacting that way to a bar graph?

Consarn It!

2007-05-10T06:22:00.000-06:00

My shuffle is working great after the headphone jack cleaning, except for the fact that now it won't charge. I wonder if some of the ethanol I used to wipe out the inside of the jack dripped down and wrecked havoc on the electronics... It's possible, although I I wouldn't expect it to continue to play songs if something had been damaged internally. Hmmm... It looks like I might get that Zen Stone after all.

Mono

2007-05-03T11:37:00.000-06:00

I have a 1st gen iPod Shuffle that I bring with me to the gym. Up until now, its been fantastic--light and easy to operate with a long battery life. Last week the headphones stopped working in stereo. The problem persisted even when I switched to a brand new pair. I'm guessing the problem lies with the jack itself... If I have to buy another mp3 player for the gym, I'm getting this:

It's the Zen Stone by Creative. It has 1GB of storage, uses a regular USB cable and computers recognize it as a USB drive, meaning it doesn't need any additional software (Apple, I'm looking in your general direction...). Probably the best thing about it is that it retails for $40. That's hot.

----------------

EDIT -- I cleaned my iPod shuffle's headphone jack as per this website (sort of...I used a q-tip

insead of an interdental brush). It works great now. Huzzah!

Droppin' a Deuce

2007-05-01T11:34:00.000-06:00

To the best of my knowledge, the first time I was present while another person dropped a deuce was in college. I'm sure I'm not alone--college is the first time a lot of people regularly use a bathroom that has a maximum occupancy greater than one. When I first heard the sploosh, it made me laugh. It still does.

Bleached Hair

2007-04-26T14:24:00.000-06:00

I've probably seen every episode of "Date My Mom" and "NEXT" ever made. That's not because I'm a fan of the shows, but rather because I'm a passive MTV viewer. By that I mean whenever I can't find anything of interest on television (that happens a lot), I flip to MTV and leave it on as background noise. Even as a passive viewer, John Norris bothers me. Why is he still at MTV? Seriously, this guy started working there when I was in grade school. Aside from CBS news anchors, who else has that kind of job security? What makes the whole situation worse is that he doesn't dress his age. He's 48 years old!! Can you name another 48 year old that bleaches his hair and hangs around high school students talking about Fall Out Boy? Yep, me neither.

Tight Roll

2007-04-20T17:58:00.000-06:00

I've been in the college environment for close to 9 years. As I've gotten older and witnessed the birth year of the incoming freshman class move further and further away from my own, I can't help but wonder if the lesser known trends of my youth are adequately preserved. Well, I'm going to do my part:

Tight Roll Jeans: An Illustrated How-to

Step 1: Pull the cuff of your jeans tight.

Step 2: Fold the hem around your ankle, keeping the jeans taut.

Step 3: Roll the cuff up once...

Step 4: ...and roll the cuff up one more time. At this point the jeans should be tight enough around the ankle that they do not need to be held. If desired, the cuff can be rolled a third time.

Step 5: Rock it.

Boy/Girl Robots

2007-04-20T11:07:00.000-06:00

Hello Readers! Do you think artificial intelligence will become so advanced that robots capable of human-like emotion will be developed? I do, and I think it is only natural that such robots be given a humanoid form (two legs, two arms, etc.). Still, I can't help wondering if these robots will be assigned a particular gender... How will one be able to distinguish a boy robot from a girl robot? Will they wear gender tags? Will their "robot figure" allow them to be identified? Perhaps their behavior should be used to characterize them as being more male-like or female-like.

Isaac Newton was a prick

2007-04-19T07:55:00.000-06:00

Flamsteed

In his first edition of Principia Mathematica, Newton failed to fully explain the motion of the moon. He wished to correct the omission in subsequent editions but required the observations of the astronomer John Flamsteed to do so. Flamsteed agreed to grant Newton access to his data but requested that they not be made public. Newton agreed. Realizing that he would be unable to complete his desired edits to Principia Mathematic without Flamsteed's notes, Newton conspired to have himself appointed to the governing body of the Royal Observatory. Using his new found authority, Newton seized Flamsteed's catalogs and had them published. Flamsteed learned of the publication and succeeded in obtaining a court order to prevent its distribution. Newton was so enranged that he deleted any mention of Flamsteed in subsequent editions of Principia Mathematica.

Leibniz

Working independently, Newton and the German mathematician Gottfried Leibniz developed calculus. While we have since learned that Newton beat Leibniz to the initial discovery by a few years, Leibniz was the first to publish his findings. The two quarrelled over who should be credited, with each receiving letters of support throughout the field. (It should be noted that many of the letters backing Newton were penned by Newton's friends and even Newton himself!) In what might be considered the ultimate bonehead move, Leibniz appealed to the Royal Society--the very same society of which Newton was president--to settle the dispute. Newton proceeded to stack the supposedly impartial committee with his friends and supporters. To no surprise, the Society found in favor of Newton and formally accused Leibniz of plagiarism. After Leibniz's death, it was said that Newton found great pleasure in "breaking Leibniz's heart."

Things I would like to do this week (in no particular order)

2007-04-17T16:00:00.000-06:00

1. See Grindhouse and/or Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters
2. Clean my apartment
3. Wash my dirty gym shirts (they're sitting in a bag in my living room)
4. Finish reading "A Brief History of Time"
5. Try making Basil Chicken
6. Change my guitar strings
7. Try to find some new jeans ($ale!!)

2007-04-16T11:58:00.000-06:00